Agape

Today such a weary day of mine, as weekdays give me so many fixations and make me so tired. Uhh I wish I wanna go to the beach again. Have some pleasure there. But nobody wanna take me there. Heh don’t mind at all. I’m quite busy lately for my studies. It half of the semester already, but I didn’t make any preparation for the examination soon. As my colleague said, it’s too early to think about exam.

Early in this morning, I received a message from my cousin asking me about the means of mending a broken heart. Again, people thought that I am good enough in any matter relating to love. Huaarrgghh.. I’m tired enough to think about love. In a simple word, what can I say is, let bygone be bygone. But it is not as easy as our heart bleed inside. Our past is a good teacher! People who made mistakes are better than people who didn’t know anything. Am I right? Letting go for person you love does not mean you are pitiless. What past is past, we need to move on to see the future.

At the moment you feel like you could fall no lower and could not feel any worse. You feel as though your life is over. But is it really? Are you really going to feel like this forever? Getting over a break up is always going to be hard but to put you on the right track there are some little words that can lift your spirit and push you in the right direction. Wherever you hear them, those few little words, can often make you smile again.

What I thought here is based on the fact that I have gone through all this while. I have been in love for the past 8 month. It is good enough to love someone when you think he/she give you so much courage. But, for the things people frequently overlook is when you are given too much hope. Remember that people change over times. You might say you wanna live with him/her till you die (it’s a common mania), but, don’t you think how about your partner’s mind? Will he/she do the same thing? Will he/she sacrifice for the betterment of 2 hearts? Will you be able to read your partner’s mind?

As time goes by, life goes on, and all you can think of is why you are gone. You may regret the way your relationship ended, but you will never regret for what you have now. As I mentioned before, I also have go through the break up before. I suffered too much even until now I still pretending that I am okay with that, but my bleeding heart slowly crying when I remember about my ex. What can I do is just keep crying as much as I can. Who cares when we are in gloomy circumstances?

People say past is past. We need to move on. But how can we move on when our past is the only thing we ever wanted in the future and it keeps haunting us? I still remember for the reason my ex told me to end the relationship between us, is just “I love you enough to let you go”. Hah, can you see how people become heartless. It is painful enough for me to accept the silly excuse. As Malay proverb, “Habis Madu Sepah Dibuang”.

What can we do? Chase your ex back? If I given a chance, I will go for that!!! Be with my ex again. Even till now I put so much hope that my ex will come back to me. Every time when I think about my ex, I will keep in mind for the memories that we have all these while. Loving someone is not fault, as long as you know how to make them feel the love you give, its all about you and your heart.

Jika kamu memancing ikan
Setelah ikan itu terlekat di mata kail
Hendaklah kamu mengambil ikan itu
Janganlah sesekali kamu LEPASKAN ia semula kedalam air begitu sahaja
Kerana ia akan SAKIT oleh kerana bisanya
Ketajaman mata kail kamu & mungkin ia akan MENDERITA selagi ia masih hidup

Begitulah juga...

Setelah kamu memberi banyak PENGHARAPAN kepada seseorang
Setelah ia mulai MENYAYANGI kamu
Hendaklah kamu MENJAGA hatinya
Janganlah sesekali kamu terus MENINGGALKANNYA begitu saja
Kerana dia akan TERLUKA oleh kenangan bersamamu
dan mungkin TIDAK dapat MELUPAKAN segalanya selagi dia masih mengingati kamu

begitu juga...

Jika kamu MENADAH air biarlah berpada
Jangan terlalu berharap pada takungannya dan menganggap ia begitu teguh
Cukuplah sekadar untuk KEPERLUANMU sahaja
Kerana apabila ia mulai RETAK

tidak sukar untuk kamu menampal dan memperbaikinya semula
Dan bukannya terus dibuang begitu sahaja

huaa...i need my "someone" :-(