Cognitive Disonance

Today such a murky day. I don’t know why suddenly it turned out to be bad. I’m sitting alone in my lovely room and listen to Celine Deon’s song, Because You Love Me. It comes to my mind something that I never thought. I do realize that peoples around me are really cares about me. At this moment, so much things mingling in my mind, I hate this kind of feeling because it will switch my emotion. Like what happened this morning, I kept myself isolated with my own world, doing my own job, take away my mouth, ignored what people talk to me and give them no responds. Sorry people, I don’t have any intention to do these weird things. I don’t know what happen to me, maybe I miss someone who already gone, it’s my late grandma. I miss her so much. Dear God, do bless her. It’s already 4 years since she past away.

I’m very sure what happened this morning affected other’s feeling and heart. People very curious on what happened to me, here I would like to make an apology to whom it may concerned. Do forgive me for things done, it’s out of my intention to do so. I’m not going to be mean. A million thanks to Tini for your cares. Wani for giving me a wish card, it so sweet. Thank to Fizanur for the song given, Kau Ada Dia by The Lima and Dilema Cinta by Ungu. And not forgotten to all my pals, Ika, Aiman, Ikin, Rose, Bella and Kuza. And a special thank to En Suhaimi A. Samad for the advices given regarding my study.

At this moment, I am so confuse about my self. I am ordinary people, sometime we unable to control our emotion, which was happened to me today. My feeling is fluctuating right now, I don’t know how to manage it to be better. Why I have to turn it to be more complicated? I don’t know. Why I have to be cheerless today? I don’t know. Why must I hurt other’s feeling? I don’t know. Why should I ruin my day? I don’t know.

Are these the reasons why people ignore me? I think so. it’s all about me myself and I because I don’t know how to appreciate peoples around me. God love me also because He sent others to take a good care of me. I should be thankful all the times.